Last week was amazing. I had one of the best dates ever, said hi to an old friend, shot some guns, saw a movie, judged at a local school, went to a book club, got an email address and a 2 new phone numbers, worshipped at a local Christian group. and chatted at my book club. Basically, I am really investing in my social life, and I really like it.
As a quick side note, I usually find it difficult to make enough food quickly in the morning, and then not come home 'til 9pm. What I've been doing to get around that, is making a salad, smoothie, oatmeal, chopped apples, and other quick meals, so that I can socialize at night and not starve.
Anyway, what was really cool this past Saturday, was that I was a judge at a local high school speech tournament. It's an easy way for me to reconnect with some great teachers, and it's a rewarding experience. Anyway, I got there around 7am and was waiting for the 1st round to start, when I noticed a cute girl sitting by herself talking on her phone. She had slightly curly hair, and I love curly hair. She had glasses, clean face (I'm trying to say acne free, but smooth skin sounds creepy). Basically this girl was beautiful. I didn't have to wait around and get to know her to decide this. Objectively, without knowing her, she was beautiful.
I immediately knew that I should go talk to her, but I was nervous about it. What would my old teachers think, seeing me talking to this cute girl? The girl was only sitting about 5 feet away from where my teachers were chatting, so it was going to be very obvious that I was flirting with this girl....Somehow I worked up the courage, and walked over to her.
Normally I lead with "Hey I thought you were really pretty." But I decided to just talk to her. I honestly wasn't really furiously thinking about the best way of how to date her; I was just thinking about talking to her.
"Hey, how's it going?"
"Oh not bad."
"So what school are you judging for?"
"Oh ok. I'm judging for *********," I said, "Can we still be friends?"
"Maybe..." she jokingly said.
"So what do you do?" I asked.
"astnasnteuhsnaetuhsh sasetnuhasoentoesanthuhae suenthnsta husntahesnuthasentueaontuhsntah," she said.
"Can you say that using one syllable words?"
"Robots. Darn, that's two syllables."
We'll call this girl Kayla.
So we chatted for a bit. I think I can still use some work as a conversationalist. And I need to become a better story teller. But I was having fun. I made some movie references that she did not get at all. I asked about her tiny tattoo. She claimed I was judging her, so I pretended to judge her for it. I turned in into a joke. The whole rest of the day, we went back and forth claiming that the other was judging.
When my first round was over, I headed back to the judges lounge, hoping to run into her again. I briefly saw her and asked if she had round 2 off, like me. She did not. I had a pretty awesome chat with an old high school teacher, who as it turns out, once wrestled a bear in a fair in the 80s. My jaw hit the floor. I've always thought of this guy as a very macho man, but wrestling a bear!? Woah.
When round 2 ended, people slowly started coming back into the judges lounge, and I saw that everyone was eating lunch. I dug in and hoped that Kayla would pop in the lounge at some point, so I could chat to her. I think I saw her pop in, and pop out.
I went to round 3 and then headed back to the judges lounge. Since I knew we only had a few more rounds left, I really needed to get her number. If I didn't do it soon, I might not get a chance. So I walked out of the lounge and went looking for her. She wasn't hard to find.
She was sitting against a wall by the cafeteria, playing with her cell phone.
"Hey what are you doing?" I asked sitting by her.
"Just chilling," she answered.
"Why aren't you hanging out in the judges lounge?"
"It's nice out here, I guess. Where you hoping I'd be in there?"
"Yeah," I said, "You would have been easier to find," I said. It's interesting to note that I'm subtly hinting that I was looking for her. I said this with such ease, but this would have been sooo hard for me to say a year or two ago.
We started talking about books.
"Are you a Harry Potter fan?" I asked.
"Not really." she answered.
"Bummer. I know a really good Harry Potter pick up line."
"Ok, try it anyway."
So I said, "I'm like Oliver Wood. I'm a keeper."
She laughed and said, "Yup, I guess I should be a fan."
At this point, she turned her body toward me. She wasn't looking right at me, but about halfway. I knew this was a good sign, so I turned toward her as well.
"Basically, I'm calling myself really fly and one of a kind," I said. Again, this would have been really hard for me to say a year or two ago.
I remembered that she thought I was judging her tatoo. So jokingly I pointed at it and said, "Is that a tatoo? Why did you get that!?"
I think it was pretty funny that I said it kind of looked like the death star.
I then started playing with her phone, trying to figure out how to properly turn the screen on. I grabbed her hand and tried pressing her thumb to the screen. Outwardly it looked like I was guessing that her phone had a fingerprint reader, but I was just really looking for an excuse to appropriately touch her.
I mentioned that I was going to go see fantastic beasts and where to find them tonight.
"Would you like to join?" I asked.
Eventually she agreed. So I asked for her number. This might have been the first time that I was able to get a girl's number, because we had both agreed to do something together. Kind of cool.
I convinced her to sit in the judges lounge with me. I introduced her to some of my old high school teachers.
One of them asked Kayla, "Are you keeping him in line?"
It almost sounded like she thought Kayla and I were dating. I found it very flattering.
At that point, the event was pretty much over, but I ended up hanging out with Kayla for about a half hour more. She showed me her ukulele, and played me a short song, which was really quite good. I made a couple of more jokes, and bragged about how I had a hot date later tonight with this really cute girl.
I gave her a hug goodbye and headed out. She texted me back soon after, and said that she had promised a friend to go to a party with her. So she wouldn't be able to see the movie with me, but she suggested that we get something to eat instead. Perfect.
We met soon after, and she found out I was a vegan. She was a little curious, I gave some answers. I told her that I liked to read, watch tv, occasionally knit and crotchet, and mess with my computer. I found out she was teaching herself music, wanted to develop operating systems, and really liked Aquaman.
I called her pretty a couple of times. And when I found out that she wanted to develop operating systems, I said, "You may just be the perfect woman."
My really good complement was, "It sounds like you don't want too many movies, because you are too busy bettering yourself."
She looked really pleased and thanked me.
Toward the end of the date, I slid back in my seat, and pushed my legs forward, leaned it against hers. It was a simple way of touching her for a long period of time.
I also avoided talking about politics.
I said, "I'm afraid you'd think I'm a conservative douschebag."
"Ok stop. You're already said to much," she said.
I found out that she wasn't a Christian. I only want to date Christians, so there won't be a date #2. But it was still really fun. I did a lot of good things. We developed a really good rapport. I had her laughing quite a bit. I let silences develop long enough for her to ask me questions. I avoided talking about bad subjects. I probably need to figure out how to ask better questions that make someone excited to answer them. But it was still really fun.
I can't stress enough how much this progress journal has helped me. It is helpful to record my thoughts, experiences, and the ways that I can improve.