Okay, so I've been thinking about how people are able to connect. Asking questions, is a good thing when connecting with people, but all your doing is asking question, then you turn into an nosey asshole or something resembling a mean old hag or a reporter.
But yet when we tell stories espically about our failures or "I should have done...." and make ourselves vulnerable, we can develope a true connection with people because they have those thoughts, emotions and experiences.
So i went to a party last week-end, where i didn't know 90% of the people there. Instead of just asking a million questions about people. I started out by asking a few questions about the people and them asking me. But instead of stopping there, I started to share stories of why I did the hobbies I love, why I worked where I worked. I didn't give some quick meaningless story, I told all the details of the ideas and emotions behind working in sales or learning to play the piano and why I still play piano and work in sales to this day.
Through out the night, I never felt alone. I had people come over to me, to listen to me. They felt safe that they could share their stories as well. And when I flirted with women who seemed "cold" to others with stories, they opened up to me and I felt like we had a good connection with them.
So the next time you go to a party where you don't know anybody, Tell me a story.